Thursday, January 5, 2012

I Am 32


I am 32 now. Wow. I don't know how to act 32, I don't even know how to act 31 previously for that matter.

Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. Praise to Allah for giving me the chance to live until now. I am thankful to Allah for blessing me with loving family and great friends.

Life is good. Actually life is great. People aren't. (something I read from twitter) Haha..

Healthwise, I'm doing fine. The disease is under-control as long as I stick to the medications. I got sick a few times last year though not related to the disease. There was a time when I was sick on and off for about 2 months. That was quite an experience.

So far, there's no improvement in romance department. I'm single/been single for the past few years.

At least I'm not emotionally-dependant to anyone. I'm not attached to someone that promise nothing. No crush or infatuation. Boring, I know. No headache and heartache. No time and money wasted.

I'm trying to embrace the looming fact that I might be an old maid for the rest of my life. This sounds a little pessimistic, but it doesn't mean that I'm depressed.

I believe that Allah has better plans, so I'm just going with the flow. Having a better half does not defines me. I define myself. I will make myself happy. I am happy. Are you happy?

Of course, there will be the occasional lonely feeling and longing for companionship. I have promised myself that I will just face it with sappy love songs and lots of chocolate. And move on, let go, whatever. I might find a new hobby in the future, like parasailing, hiking (yea rite haha), pole dancing or anything to combat those negative feelings.

I always tell myself, if I'm not married then I will really take care of my parents. That's not so bad, isn't it? After all, they've done so much for me. It's time to repay them. If I want kids someday, I'll harass my siblings to produce lots of nieces and nephews for me. Heheh..

So I will live my life like this. I'll accept whatever/whoever comes along the way. I am, after all, is now 32.

Happy Birthday, me! :)

2 comments:

Ummu Auni said...

sanah helwah!!! may years ahead bring joy to you. I realised non married doesn't mean being miserable. i've met tough ladies who are single in the late 40s or 50s and still feeling content with it. I aim to be like them! here is to a new year, and a more optimistic us!

Sir Pök Déng said...

Happy Birthday.